Friday .... scarry day but, sad cause also rainny day

Purple.......
y ?

cause i feel cold ,cold..... sad, sad.... down down.....
today is halloween day.... Some 1 make me sad ,some 1 make me down.... ,some one make me happy.... some 1 make me cry .... , some 1 make me smile in my heart but tears on face y? Gam dong lor..... at

*1st i slp late to cls....
* 2nd kena scolded by my mom....
* 3rd feel (an wei) long time dint have tht kind of feel, felling dying , need water .... sudent my Dr.... so good reach thr a bottle of water, a assignment done.... feel happy got ppl sayang.....
*4th whn to cls still got lence ask and sayang happy too...
*5th scarry cause ah yik driving ngeeeeeeeeeeeeek!!!!!!!!!!! still got little bit bom!
*6th cold cold de ...... but lucky Dr. giving me a jacket.... and got lence help me cover wind....
*7th feel down down 1 ..... feel sry to a person... i noe tht u want me happy !! as i noe tht u also unhappy!! but u just act like ntg cause u want me to be happy!! i feel warm .... nice.... happy and everything frm u .....
*8th yes?anything joe i really wanna hear tht anything from u ,but i duwant i scared whn i hear anything tht i cannot take it i will feel sad , down ... but i miss it... i dunno do u read or had a look on my blog but any way wish u happy with ur gf.... yes... i miss u.... so? can i do anything no!! just unhappy all the way... but is ok !!! i am fine thx .... for ur treating and make me grow....
*9th cnt eat any things just (tun tun tun) my teeth very pain a.... but i also feel happy la .... noe y cause i can gam fei hehe!!! i wanna hit target on 40kg..... tell me tht i can if u support....
*10th dunno, everything dnt ask dnt care.... i learn 1 thing...

DONT ASK QUESTION!!
DONT LISENT TO PPL THT CLOSE OR GOOD TO U!!
DONT THINK JUST DO IT!!
TIME MANAGE!!
SHUT UP WHN I NVR ASK!!
WHN I WANNA TELL I WILL BUT DNT ASK MORE .....

issit good to learn it or???
haix.... i really dunno la....

wow is been 3 days no hand up my report to my dr tim....

Tuesday , shit wht i did i 4get... but haha actually i remember...
70%
wednesday,club tierd dying..... but still had 80% cause u're beside me...
thursday, erm... tierd to watch movie ,see marion ,feel funny....... ntg much normal normal...... so i give my self 60%....

i wanna tell u.....
i love romance ,
i scared boring,
i scared lonely,
i love surprise,
i hate crying,
i need warn,
i need care alot,
so.........
noe wht to do ?
or dunno nvrm....
i will wait....

understand & really feel dam fucking sry abt today +10000000 of sry!!!!

=======================================================

Monday, Sunny day

Hey !!! yoyo first time i write blog in summer & sunny days.... means wht ler? Means tht my % today is high lor ..... hehe..... last few days i dint post .... 1st because i am too down no energy to write down... morning cry afternoon cry ....... no eat no drink....... 2nd i really feel tht i am too stupid... totaly blank in my mine..... 3rd heart broke ..... haix.... dunno wht to say abt my self lor...

OKAYSZzzz.... i write down my marks for past two days....

Saturday , raining days........ (10%)
Sunday , okay abit de cause not the whole day raining........ (50%)

See improf alot ler thx to some 1 Dr.xxx..... i noe event though i dint pick ur hp call but as long as i still noe tht ur a responsible Dr... lor hehe.... really sry abt my stupid ways to let u knoe hope u wont feel tht i am a stupid Dai b clients in ur world lor hehe.....

And my dear ngong ngong lence a...... Why u think u in my hear is like this de ler..... Y think so much negetive ways wor.... u really , Really misunderstand de la... my dear...... i dnt mean it tht way ok? dnt think tooo much i am so happy tht u always care me... u in my heart is perfect and nice person lai de la..... think all sot sot things u really a...... lolx...... dunno wht to say la.....

Dr. c..... sry abt i dint pick up ur calls....
sry abt make u worry....
sry abt nvr reply ur sms.....
sry abt let u wait.........
sry abt nvr c my hp got rang bo......

(ITS BECAUSE I AT CASINO LOOSING MONEY A ... LOST UNTILL HALF DEATH ON THR DE...... *NGO CHA HM DO XU DOU YOU LOOK LOK SAN JOR LA)
so i nvr bother abt my hp lor.... some more no credit jor a.....

haix,..... my whole body no money dam kelian u good la eat HOU YEH, drink HOU YEH.....
i dont care a..... u dnt so tok sek a........ must treat me 1 ma.... lolo although i am ur patiens also got a cup of coffe kua at (the place u always go de la) Ha...Ha...
i ntg de la....... still in recover moment but is cover as fast as it can be de lor......
thx alot

2day i will give my self 80%/.........

thx for Dr.c ,my dear lence........ ex............

at last give u guys a smile face sin =) hehe

night night ........

*muaks*

Cioaz........

?

thursday,raining again....

I am using blur green.... y ler cause my world now sad sad de...... i cry alot of times today... i tell my self i shouldn't cry , i cnt cry any more but i did it again.....

OOPS I DID IT AGAIN...... I CRY IN MY HEART THE TEARS COME OUT AGAIN...

how a? how a?
Dr C. i think alot of stupid things.... i also dunno wht to write down.... i think bck all thigs tht i miss all things tht made me unhappy de.... in red box... whn i hear some song i cry ..... cause sing k usually sing chines song de ma...... chines song easy made ppl sad and cry..... why ler? cause the melody is tooo down.... so i hate chines song alot alot.... i wanna change all of my self i every day made my seld blur blur like this so i cnt use any energy to think things..... i think maybe wo de xing tai luan gua....... i am a stupid.... stupid girl....... i want ppl care me alot lor....need warm care...... but y i cnt get de? y tell me y? Dr.c a...... today i think i only can give my self 20%......

i really feel like wanna die de...... i cnt stand....

lence gor gor.... sry a.... not i duwant reply and tell u .... cause my hp no more credit.... i really like ur cares..... i miss it ...... i hope u dnt get sad.... i promise u the joanne tht u noe will be bck ok..... muaks......

Dr. c....... HElp..... i need all the medicson frm u alot alot can u give me.....?
i noe tht i am a girl tht gives alot of trouble to u...... i felt so sry...... sometimes i really think tht ...... dnt fan u ..... this dr.c but i cnt i duwant to be alone....

Today i fail de ..... just....

20%.....

=(

wednesday,again raining day

Today i am chossing blue color to write ,cause today i feel blur blur down down.....
i really very tierd o today... blur blur go school , blur blur go cls..... thn blur blur go lacoste buy present..... spen so much money...... hiax....first present in this month bonia purse now lacoste pls la u all dnt birthday anymore i scared de...but 2 dAY dunno y sudently so down ........ reach home, get a phone call ... i am aready very tierd still like getting scolded.......... sad ....T.T
thn i cried i feel very san fu........ dunno y suddently think something unhappy but very (kei guai)
i also dunno wht i think ......... thn lence call me cheer me up...... christ cheer me up........ sweatney cheer me up......... seng cheer me up....... but dunno y still down......... cried....... and thn slowly slowly ntg de.....because i am luckly to have a docter to cheer me..... beside me.... haha....... i give u 100++ kisses....lence i really very happy whn u call me and so care me ....... thx....... muaks!!! lence didi u younger thn me , but i feel i useless thn u how? this made me sad too u noe.....? haha

today my sickness slowly came back but, suddently go away........ because of u doctor.......
i really feel like happy so much , cause whn i down got doctor who was only got me 1 client and can care me so much...... today actually i think bck how i pass by all my sadness.... i miss bck him but , i hate him....

AS LONG AS>>> (WE HATE LOVE, WE LOVE HATE) <<<<<<<<<

isiit the truth ??? i think so i really think so........ i hate my self but i need to love my self..... thn i hate him should i learn to love him bck ? i think no lor...
and i am unhappy because my b'day is comming.... actually i miss last year birthday alot got (yin hua), (99 roses), (fat gok chan),(big bear bear),(sui jing lin).... LIANG really miss tht wonderfull b'th day tht u celebrate to me..... i will nvr 4 get i will keep it in mind 4 ever..... i am sry tht i dint accept u .... but i aready try my hardess but still cnt ...... but i dunno y i always miss it ..... and while i was missing i cried down..... sad..... i really very scared a doctor C .....
how ler.........

wht can i do because of this i cried alot de.......
so today i still give my self 50% ngam ngam pass.....
u noe y ? cause whn i sad tht time it was only 10%.....
but whn my doctor come make me laught (TERUS) up to 50%......
hehe........ Mr. doctor C...... is a good and nice doctor o...... but sry guys tht is only my individual doctor........

Right? Doctor c ??? hehe

Just m3

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Tuesday, Raining day

Today is raining day again...... again i am writing blog haha .... i feel tht i am so dam stupid y? c so long no post blog de ...... cause 4 get how to post funny hor.... but i am happy also , i nvr post thts mean tht i am getting better and better on my sadness sick.... actually y i recover my sickness ler,,,, maybe tht i noe some friends tht care me , sharring all kind of stuff with me kua....

actually i really dunno who am i , wht am i doing a..... i just want to be happy duwant to be lonely always ... i want smile ... duwant :( but now while i am writting my blog and chtting with some 1..... i very tierd de but need to do home work.... i am happy tht u r being my side acompany me the whole night .. thx alot muaks and wont make me feel lonely... i am happy i had aready 4 get him..... not 4get la is wont think abt those things de..... i feel tht i am so stupid... mou yok hor gau de......

我感觉到，什么是快乐什么是不快乐了。。。
快乐因该要自己真取，而不是等着别人给。。。
也许，有爱情`的world会开心有色彩。。。。但是，却是会很痛连呼吸也会痛。。
我不想再痛了。。。。。
算了。。
忘了。。。
拥有过就是了。。。

isiit?
haix..... c la c la this stupid joanne still think of this kind of things 4 wht wor....

study hard hard.... and hope tht i will succes and u guys too.....

and come on larh really need some one teman me go some relaxing places like sea side .......... i love sea ....... the smells of sea is cool enought.... hmm.....

love it and it is also time to bed de.....

erm,,,, taday is happy day i will give my self 70%hehe.....

today is sunday ,also raining day

dunno y everytime whn i wanna write a blog also raining day maybe whn the time i wanna write i am sad kau..... today i just came bck frm frnd house because both night i also very scared dnt dare to slp alone ..... morning i am still ok but whn fall at night i feel unconfert, very lonely and scarry....... i really dunno wht am i doing actually i had alot of things to do ...... assignment , help my mom , entertain with friends and much more..... but i keep on think at things tht i am not happy.... i like him but i dnt dare or feel like be with him because loved a person must see him happy thts enought .... since now he got gf de..... today i just wish him i wont destroyed or feel unhappy de i must be...... i am totaly give up whn i say this word out tht time i hope i will do it .... i cht in msn with my frnd tony he tell me alot he talk alot to me ........ y he like nike? the text of nike is wht ? (just do it) i really happy tht whn i am down still got ppl who will care of me and talk with me.... i like people to talk with me .......... y ......... because i scared lonely...... and some more tuck wai thx for giving me a hand whn i am down ... i really miss u hope i will c u soon..... i am sry i dint accept u but ..... i really hope too..... y because i wont easy get couple with a guy .... i really get deep hurt before..... i really hope tht u r beside me like last time ........ the time with u i feel happy ........ cause u always make me smile......=)

i will try to behappy hope u guys who care me will pray all happines to me .....
haix...... very tierd a just finish assignment i been sitting on my table for 5 house for doing the stupid assignment ......... but i am happy to do with it lor........


hahahaha ...........

hope i will write down wht i want wht i need 4 my future ... i will de

today is friday also raining day

today i very tierd and unhappy i dunno y, today i meet bck my x i know i still like him and he also but so how wor.... people got gf de..... i aready duwant pick up his call duwant msn with him de la but dunno y ..... he tell me tht he i also dunno how to say la. BUT i tried to ask him abt his gf thing this and tht but dunno y he keep on telling me got or dint have also looks like the same . so i only ask him wanna go outstation with me? he say yes..... ok .... but should i i really dunno lor ......... whn he say yes tht time i really feel tht dam happy de ............ but whn tonight i call him he say i will call u bck tomorow , at tht time mt tears r alrd falling ...... y wor ,? y whn people start to give up u , u need to treat bck people on this way? if u really still love me can u pls be fare to me.... if u got gf i will not wanna be the middle 1.... sry ......... i really dunno how to say abt myself actually i really got alot of things tht need to do y am i thinking all this stupid stuff wor? i really feel very stress .... sad,,,,,... joe a hope u really know wht i need .......

Today is thursday rainning day

today is my dad bitrth day , i sleep late no go to class, but in the afternoon i find patrick and go there to buy car charger i was very angry my charger has spoil .. alot of friend wanna find me , but cant find . thn ..... i ask lence out to teman me , 1st because i am so boring and thn i find him to acc me to find a give for my dad . haha but quite funny la, i also dunno wanna buy wht ..... thn walk walk walk , after tht we go out smoke lor..... thn i hear some lence story he say tht actually he is a rich guy but after 1997 all (gu PIu) fall ,,,, so his dad (poh Chan)... whn i heard this i few like sounds sad to him ...... but, actually me my self also la, i am a girl tht come frm penang y ler,? cause i am (loh Lui) whts means tht i am anak angkat frm my dad now lo, and thn i get rape before la whn i was small, after tht my family at tioman there got a big troble la, haix........
i dunno la i feel tht the whole world like very upset ..... not only me lor..... and thn i drive home erm... actually i love to drive de because no need think so much kua, but whn i started to drive i very scared tht i saw accident or wht , every time whn i saw an accident i feel like cry ...... maybe i try before tht some one near u r leaving.... i duwant the same thing happen on others i scared to see people crying too...... after tht i fetch my sis go 1u buy bonia purse for my dad, whn i went to my dad shp my dad was so shock !!! he nvr know tht we r going lor..... haha whn i c my dad happy i also happy ,,,.... i nvr talk to my dad for long time ago but every thing had aready passs i think will be alright.... thn at night i recive a sms frm my ex joe wanna meet ma tomorow
actually not i duwant pick up ur hp........ is because u got gf de ........ i duwant to (chak san) u all lo... but i really miss u ..... nvm i tell my self tht i will give my self a new road,,, i fall before but i must climb up ...... sometimes i really think tht i not a couple choise in this world every time whn in love i will cry cry cry .......... my tears just like a water paip very easy to come out de i also dunno y .......... i hope every 1 who cares me will really take a heart to tell me wht am i doing now? i still got alot of things to do , why should i think all this kind of things......... i really wanna get mad.... i dunno y whn i was not happy or wht i wanna write all the things out and tell my self to memories it isit a good memo? or ? i really dunno ..... 2day i really feel like writting this blog to tell my self tht wht am i doing in a a day ...... should i? now is aready 3:30 a.m i cnt slp dunno y assignment also duwant to do ........... i dunno wht am i doing .........

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